Genealogy Humor

Christmas is the time when my grandmother made Fattigmand - forgive the spelling - it was eagerly awaited by all we grandchildren as its being served the first time signalled the beginning of the Christmas season.

I would guess that your "fattigmand" would correspond to the swedish
"fattiga riddare".

Poor Knights "fattiga riddare" is a dish made of bread that has been kept in a mixture of eggs, flour and milk and then fried. One can also make them in just eggs and milk, or only milk. Frequently used are white bread that has become a bit old and dry.

Ulf - what we called fattigmand was made with brandy, egg whites, cardamon seed and flour and rolled thinly , cut into triangles and one point pulled through a slit to form a knot and then deep fried till crisp. It was yummy to my palate but my husband and family have never acquired a taste for it.

Its called fattigmann i Norway and is made as you describe.

Fattigmann sounds like "French toast" - cover it with maple syrup! Yum!

Elise ... and I had to use the Yiddish Dictionary to write it...my Grandma Tillie is rolling over...

The True Story of Rudolph

A man named Bob May, depressed and brokenhearted, stared out his drafty apartment window into the chilling December night.

His 4-year-old daughter, Barbara, sat on his lap quietly sobbing. Bob's wife, Evelyn, was dying of cancer and Little Barbara couldn't understand why her mommy could never come home. Barbara looked up into her dad's eyes and asked, "Why isn't Mommy just like everybody else's Mommy?" Bob's jaw tightened and his eyes welled with tears. Her question brought waves of grief, but also of anger. It had been the story of Bob's life. Life always had to be different for Bob.

Small when he was a kid, Bob was often bullied by other boys. He was too little at the time to compete in sports. He was often called names he'd rather not remember. From childhood, Bob was different and never seemed to fit in. Bob did complete college, married his loving wife and was grateful to get his job as a copywriter at Montgomery Ward during the Great Depression. Then he was blessed with his little girl. But it was all short-lived. Evelyn's bout with cancer stripped them of all their savings and now Bob and his daughter were forced to live in a two-room apartment in the Chicago slums. Evelyn died just days before Christmas in 1938.

Bob struggled to give hope to his child, for whom he couldn't even afford to buy a Christmas gift. But if he couldn't buy a gift, he was determined to make one - a storybook! Bob had created an animal character in his own mind and told the animal's story to little Barbara to give her comfort and hope. Again and again Bob told the story, embellishing it more with each telling. Who was the character? What was the story all about? The story Bob May created was his own autobiography in fable form. The character he created was a misfit outcast like he was. The name of the character? A little reindeer named Rudolph, with a big shiny nose. Bob finished the book just in time to give it to his little girl on Christmas Day. But the story doesn't end there. 



The general manager of Montgomery Ward caught wind of the little storybook and offered Bob May a nominal fee to purchase the rights to print the book. Wards went on to print,” Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer” and distribute it to children visiting Santa Claus in their stores. By 1946 Wards had printed and distributed more than six million copies of Rudolph. That same year, a major publisher wanted to purchase the rights from Wards to print an updated version of the book.

In an unprecedented gesture of kindness, the CEO of Wards returned all rights back to Bob May. The book became a best seller. Many toy and marketing deals followed and Bob May, now remarried with a growing family, became wealthy from the story he created to comfort his grieving daughter. But the story doesn't end there either. 



Bob's brother-in-law, Johnny Marks, made a song adaptation to Rudolph. Although the song was turned down by such popular vocalists as Bing Crosby and Dinah Shore, it was recorded by the singing cowboy, Gene Autry. "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer" was released in 1949 and became a phenomenal success, selling more records than any other Christmas song, with the exception of "White Christmas." 



oops, I forgot the ending.

The gift of love that Bob May created for his daughter so long ago kept on returning back to bless him again and again. And Bob May learned the lesson, just like his dear friend Rudolph, that being different isn't so bad. In fact, being different can be a blessing.

Merry Christmas to one and all.

...IN THE TRUE HOLIDAY SPIRIT ...a veeery heartwarming story.....

There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses.
One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to G-d with no actual address.
He thought he should open it to see what it was about.
The letter read:

Dear G-d,

I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse.
It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension payment. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with, have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope...
Can you please help me?
Sincerely, Edna

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman.
The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.
Christmas came and went.
A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to G-d. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read:

Dear G-d,

How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me?

Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends.
We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.
By the way, there was $4 missing.

I think it might have been those bastards at the post office.

Sincerely, Edna

We'll call this one "How To Maintain Marital Bliss"...

An older relative of mine recently shared a story about a first cousin of mine several times removed, [Fannie Tolby Row Fanny Kent Row].

Her husband, [Horace Row Horace Row] related the story at a family reunion many years ago. He was asked by some of the younger relatives how he and Fanny had managed to stay married for so long and had never said a cross word to each in public. Many of the youngsters wanted the secret to their long and peaceful relationship.

Horace said that when they were married they left the church and went to go into Fredericksburg to stay at a hotel for their honeymoon. Horace said that he had his favorite white mare, Maude, all hitched up to the buggy before the ceremony and once the rice was thrown, he and his new bride, Fanny, got in and headed to town.

A few miles down the road, Maude started to trot, and it being a dirt road, the ride was both dusty and uncomfortable and Fanny became visibly frightened. As Maude started to gallop, Fanny told Horace to stop the buggy. Fanny got out and went forward to talk to the horse. At the end of the discussion, Horace heard her say "That's number 1!" whereupon Fanny got back in the buggy and told Horace he could proceed.

A few more mile down the road, Maude again began to trot, and then pick up speed to a gallop. Fanny told Horace once again to stop the buggy. She hopped out the buggy and again had a rather heated discussion with the horse that included a lot of gestures and finger pointing. She concluded it with "That's number 2!".

Fanny got back in the buggy and they proceeded until they were almost into town and the hotel was in sight. At that point, Maude broke into a gallop and Horace was hard pressed to stop her as they reached the hotel.

As they stopped, Fanny jumped out the buggy and ran around to the horse. She hollered, "That's number 3!" and she drew a small revolver from her purse and shot Maude right between the eyes. The horse immediately fell over dead right in the street.

At that point, Horace was horrified and he jumped out the buggy and went over to Fanny and said, "Why in world did you shoot my prize mare, Maude? What were you thinking?"

Fanny looked at him, pointed her finger and said "That's number one!"

Donald, what a great story!!! I can see why Horace had such a successful marriage!!! I will share this with my email "family" with minor modifications to "protect the innocent". Thanks for the contribution.

Happy New Year. Keep them coming

Short Winter Jokes

Q: What do you get from sitting on the ice too long?
A: Polaroids!

Q: What's an ig?
A: A snow house without a loo!

Q: Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman than a regular one?
A: You have to hollow out the head.

Q: Why did Frosty the snowman want a divorce?
A: Because he thought his wife was a flake

Q: Getting a job in the Arctic in the winter is great! Why?
A: When the days get short, you only have to work a 30-minute workweek.

Q: Why do seals swim in salt water?
A: Because pepper water makes them sneeze!

Q: Where can you find an ocean without any water?
A: On a map!

Q: What eight letters can you find in water from the Arctic Ocean?
A: H to O! (H20)

Q: What do you call a gangsta snowman?
A: Froze-T

Q: Which side of an Arctic Tern has the most feathers?
A: The outside!

Q: What vegetable was forbidden on the ships of Arctic explorers?
A: Leeks!

Q: What did Amaruq say after building an igloo out of crystal clear ice?
A: "Living in a transparent igloo has its disadvantages - but you should see the murres smack it!"

Q: Why didn't the tourist in the Arctic get any sleep?
A: He plugged his electric blanket into the toaster by mistake - and kept popping out of bed all night!

Q: What happened when all the musk ox wool that was collected was stolen?
A: The police combed the area.

Q: If the sun shines while it's snowing, what should you look for?
A: Snowbows.

Q: What did one Greenland Shark say to the other?
A: "Say, good lookin'... didn't I meet you last night at the feeding frenzy?"

Q: What's a sign that you have an irrational fear of icebergs?
A: You start having water-tight compartments installed in your pants.

Q: What did the seal say when it swam into a concrete wall?
A: "Dam!"

Q: What do women use to stay young looking in the Arctic?
A: Cold cream.

Q: Why was the Saami herder given an umbrella?
A: Because of the rain, dear.

Q: What do you call a reindeer with no eyes?
A: I have no eye deer.

Q: What did one Arctic murre say to the other?
A: "What? We flew 2000 miles for THIS?!"

Q: What did the detective in the Arctic say to the suspect?
A: "Where were you on the night of September to March?"

Q: What noise wakes you up at the North Pole around March 18?
A: The crack of dawn!

Q: If you live in an igloo, what's the worst thing about global warming?
A: No privacy!

Q: What did the walrus say when it was late?
A: "I would have been here sooner, but my iceberg hit a ship."

Q: When are your eyes not eyes?
A: When the cold Arctic wind makes them water!

Q: What did the icy Arctic road say to the truck?
A: "Want to go for a spin?"

Q: What do you use to catch an Arctic hare?
A: A hare net!

Q: What do you call ten Arctic hares hopping backwards through the snow together?
A: A receding hare line.

Q: Why are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean?
A: They're both below C level!

Q: What are caribou calves given to wear?
A: Hoof-me-downs.

Q: What did the big furry hat say to the warm woolly scarf?
A: "You hang around while I go on ahead."

Q: What's the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush?
A: One crushes boats and the other brushes coats!

Q: What do Saami reindeer herders say to reindeer who complain?
A: "Venison!"

Q: What do you call fifty penguins in the Arctic?
A: Lost! REALLY lost! (Penguins live in Antarctica.)

Q: Why aren't penguins as lucky as Arctic murres?
A: The poor old penguins can't go south for the winter.

Q: How do you keep from getting cold feet?
A: Don't go around BRRfooted!

Q: Where do seals go to see movies?
A: The dive-in!

Q: What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?
A: Owlgebra.

Q: What sits on the bottom of the cold Arctic Ocean and shakes?
A: A nervous wreck.

Q: How do you know if there's a snowman in your bed?
A: You wake up wet!

Q: What's the difference between a walrus and a banana?
A: You'd better find out, because if you ever try to peel a walrus...

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjokes/weatherjokes/winterjokes...

Since the New Year is rapidly approaching I thought this might be interesting. We can hope that WE will do better than many of our ancestors when it comes to making resolutions. Hope everyone has a safe & Happy New Year.

1852 NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS SOLVE GENEALOGICAL MYSTERIES.

The story of Henry Hydenwell was taken from Alabama Pioneers:
It is New Year's Eve 1852 and Henry HYDENWELL sits at his desk by candlelight. He dips his quill pen in ink and begins to write his New Year's resolutions.

1. No man is truly well-educated unless he learns to spell his name at least three different ways within the same document. I resolve to give the appearance of being extremely well-educated in the coming year.

2. I resolve to see to it that all of my children will have the same names that my ancestors have used for six generations in a row.

3. My age is no one's business but my own. I hereby resolve to never list the same age or birth year twice on any document.

4. I resolve to have each of my children baptized in a different church--either in a different faith or in a different parish. Every third child will not be baptized at all or will be baptized by an itinerant minister who keeps no records.

5. I resolve to move to a new town, new county, or new state at least once every ten years--just before those pesky enumerators come around asking silly questions.

6. I will make every attempt to reside in counties and towns where no vital records are maintained or where the courthouse burns down every few years.

7. I resolve to join an obscure religious cult that does not believe in record keeping or in participating in military service.

8. When the tax collector comes to my door, I'll loan him my pen, which has been dipped in rapidly fading blue ink.

9. I resolve that if my beloved wife Mary should die, I will marry another Mary.

10. I resolve not to make a will. Who needs to spend money on a lawyer?
Author Unknown

(oops, found this at the end of the doc that I have these on & since they go with the first 10, thought I had better add them now as there are more that others have added to the above that I will be adding in the next day or so.)

*Addendum to No. 2: My brothers promise to do likewise, thereby ensuring that each of our children has the same name as the cousins of the approximate same age.

*Addendum to No. 2: I will also take up the same occupation as my relatives of similar
name - lest children of the family give away too much information on certs.

*Addendum to No. 9: But if my wife should shack up with someone else she will henceforth be called by his unknown surname and will vanish from the record. As will the children she takes with her. Thus they will join the ranks of the Undead. I will shack up with another woman of unknown surname who will henceforth be called by my surname. And I may call myself anything I want on a census when I should really be with my legitimate family so as to disguise the fact that I am with my illegitimate family

Addendum to No. 10 I resolve that if I do make a will, I shall be careful not to actually name any of my children...

Patricia, you are a pure genius on geni when it comes to humor. : )

Private User Thanks for the compliment. I tend to take things a little too seriously sometimes, and feel that we all take genealogy too seriously at times. This discussion is a way of proving that life needs to be taken less so... after all Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly!!! Also, because there is sooooo much in the news that is & can be upsetting, we need something to cause a laugh or two!!!

I also like to share positive & inspiring thoughts. Remember: If life gives you 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000 reasons to smile (or laugh)!!!

Here are some more resolutions from the above site...

Others have added the following:

11. I resolve to not clutter up the good farm pastures with headstones that will just get broken or fade with time anyway.

12. I resolve to protect my family and friends' privacy by giving false names and places for events.

13. I resolve to never give the correct accounts of misdeeds in the family, so although Uncle Lem shot that guy and was tried for murder, my kids will be told he stole a cow.

14. I resolve to never trim the family cemetery of brush and tangleweed to keep out anyone doing that silly genealogical work.

15. I resolve to always alternate my children's and wife's first and middle names when the census taker comes around just to give him practice with his spelling.

16. I resolve to come from Ireland, where there are no records, or, if there are, they can only be examined by visiting the exact village and pleading with the local clergy, who is hostile to anyone not of his belief, which, of course, you are, and/or handing over a fee equal to or exceeding your yearly income for one hour's research, which may not find anything.

17. I resolve that not only shall I NOT die in my country of birth, but that nor shall my children (yea, verily) unto the sixth generation.

18. I resolve that I shall call my children by odd names, which the enumerator shall spell incorrectly.

19. I resolve that I shall be absent on the night of the census.

20. I resolve that if unable to be absent on census night, I shall endeavor to be enumerated twice.

21. I resolve that when I die my children/wife is instructed to give the wrong details for my death certificate.

22. I resolve that I and most of my family shall die suddenly just before death certifications started to be used in a parish where easy access to the records ceased the previous year.

23. I resolve to use the name that was my middle name on all documents except when I am born, marry or die. Why bother remembering where you were born? Just enter wherever you're living at the time!

24. I will put down an occupation I may have had, about 20 years ago, even though I am doing something completely different in a different town now.

25. I resolve to leave lots of family photographs, but never to inscribe the names or relationships of those in the pictures.

26. In the above manner, I will enshrine myself and my progeny to the whims of all those descendants who wish me to be more like they believe they are.

27. I resolve to not only change the spelling of my surname when talking to those pesky enumerators, but to change it to something totally different from time to time.

28. All of my children will be known by their familiar pet name on several official documents instead of that by which they were baptised.

29. I will either not marry the mother of my children (though she will use my surname) or will ensure that the record of the marriage can never be found.

30. I will change my occupation at least every 10 years.

31. My children shall be called by their first name some of the time and by their middle name at other times. The middle names of some of them shall be the same as the first name of others.

New Year Thoughts & Quotes

“Another fresh new year is here . . .
Another year to live!
To banish worry, doubt, and fear,
To love and laugh and give!

This bright New Year is given me
To live each day with zest . . .
To daily grow and try to be
My highest and my best!

I have the opportunity
Once more to right some wrongs,
To pray for peace, to plant a tree,
And sing more joyful songs!”
William Arthur Ward
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.”
Bill Vaughn
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.”
Edith Lovejoy Pierce
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right.”
Oprah Winfrey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In the New Year, may your right hand always be stretched out in friendship, but never in want.
Irish Toast
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A new beginning is perhaps the best time to say…

It’s so nice to know you…

And here’s wishing our friendship

Continues to grow in the days to come.
Author Unknown
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.
Helen Keller
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.
Einstein
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It is difficult to live in the present, ridiculous to live in the future, and impossible to live in the past. Nothing is as far away as one minute ago.
Jim Bishop
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room-by-room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives... not looking for flaws, but for potential.
- Ellen Goodman
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
May all my problems last as long as my New Year's Resolutions.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy New Year Patricia!

Happy New Year to you all!

Happy New Year to All who read this discussion & to those who have contributed, thank you, your contributions are appreciated. May 2015 be like a blank book that is waiting for you to fill up it's 365 pages with all the colors under the sun making it a vibrant addition to your life.

My wishes for you: great start for January, love for February, peace for March, no worries for April, fun for May, joy for June to November, happiness for December. 
 Have a Lucky and Wonderful 2015!

"I Wish in this New Year God gives you,
12 Month of Happiness,
52 Weeks of Fun,
365 Days Success,
8760 Hours Good Health,
52600 Minutes Good Luck,
3153600 Seconds of Joy…and that’s all!"

New Year Wishes for each of you:
I wish you to have the
Sweetest Sunday,
Marvelous Monday,
Tasty Tuesday,
Wonderful Wednesday,
Thankful Thursday,
Friendly Friday, and
Successful Saturday.

For everybody in the world,
whatever color their skin may be,
whatever their religion may be,
whatever their situation may be,
good health, lots of love of possibilities and... peace!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ONE AND ALL. MAY YOU BE BLESSED!!!
Hugs and lots of love,
Angels be with you & your loved ones,
Pat

Happy New Year

I want to thank everyone that I had the privilege of doing genealogy research with in 2014, and I am looking forward to helping research with you all more and more in 2015. Happy new year and May God bless you all in this brand new year.

Happy New Year to you All!

Happy New Year to all genealogists here on the web. May 2015 see results to your research and more family discovered to love.

It seems to me that most of my time on Geni is spent monitoring profiles of my relatives. Take, for example, this one of my 5th ggf - thanks to someone's merges he now has 24 fathers; 47 children; 95 siblings & 5 wives...and, he accomplished all this by his death, at age 33!

Linda, say your 5th ggf started at 18 then he would have 15 years to go 5 wives all at once he could have had 75 !!! no wonder he died at 33 !

Aarrgh, Sydney! I see these female ancestors with 14-22 children & can't imagine how they managed, what with churning the butter & all the other chores. :)

BTW, when the "About" section says "share something about...", & there are only a couple of "followers" on the Profile & it looks a little lonely, is anyone else tempted to say something like "He was a really, really nice guy"?

Linda, Hummmm... those 24 fathers could have had only had 3-4 children each (& one was him?), and those 5 wives only had 9-10 children each. Sounds like someone didn't know which was his father so they listed all just to be sure... He could have also believed in polygamy!!!

I don't envy any of the women "back" then as there was way tooooooo much to do and no modern amenities to help them!!!! They didn't know much about birth control back then either or they had really randy husbands!!! Also there wasn't much to do after dark soooooo, nature would take it's course!