Genealogy Humor

i have captain Preserved Fish on my tree

Ancestors Of Yesterday... 
By Sandy Lamere Solari

Ancestors of so long ago,
I'll search until I find.
Till I can prove and clearly show,
that you are truly mine.
I'll follow behind your trail of tears, 
the hidden footprints of time. 
Covered and buried throughout the years, 
and continue each mountain to climb.
I'll search every faraway seaside shore, 
and every valley below. 
I'll unlock each and every door, 
as my own teardrops flow.
I'll unearth the buried History of you, 
and your own Ancestral kin, 
I'll search for that all important clue, 
and open my heart to let you in.

The Elusive Ancestor
by Merrell Kenworthy
Based on “Kinsman”, Original poem by Wayne Hand, 1999

I went searching for an ancestor, I cannot find him still.
He moved around from place to place and did not leave a will.
He married where a courthouse burned. He mended all his fences.
And avoided any man who came to take the U.S. Census
He always kept his luggage packed, this man who had no fame,
And every 20 years or so, this rascal changed his name.
His parents came from Europe.  They should be on some list
of passengers to the U.S.A., but somehow they got missed.
And no one else in this whole world is searching for this man.
So, I play geneasolitaire to find him if I can.
I'm told he's buried in a plot, with tombstone he was blessed;
but weather took engraving, and some vandals took the rest.
He died before the county clerk decided to keep records.
No Family Bible has emerged, in spite of all my efforts,
To top it off, this ancestor, who caused me many groans,
Just to give me one more pain betrothed a girl named Jones.

That was funny, where's the like button! :)

ROYAL AND NOBLE LINKS:
LITTLE KNOWN KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE

We've all heard of Sir Lancelot and Sir Gawain from the days of Camelot. However, there were a number of other lesser-known knights needed to run the kingdom. Here are a few of them:

* Sir Charge . . . Royal mail order clerk
* Sir Lee . . . Royal bureaucrat
* Sir Loin . . . Royal butcher
* Sir Mise . . . Royal detective
* Sir Mount . . . Royal mountain climber
* Sir Plus . . . Royal supply officer
* Sir Press . . . Royal censor
* Sir Prize . . . Royal tactician
* Sir Render . . . Royal tactician (retired)
* Sir Round . . . Royal moat builder
* Sir Vey . . . Royal surveyor
* Sir Vive . . . Royal adventurer

That's amazing Patricia Ann Scoggin.

There’s always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example, I’m sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don’t hurt.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease… that’s when your chest is falling into your drawers.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Visiting Doctor Ross last month Paula, a long retired schoolteacher, explained in some detail her problems while he listened very patiently.

“Now, Paula,” said Doctor Ross, “you say you have shooting pains in your neck, aching knees, frequent dizzy spells, and constant nausea. Just for the record, how old are you?”

“Ah, yes,” Paula spoke brightly, “I’ll be 49 on my next birthday.”

“Really?” commented the doctor quietly, “I see you have slight memory loss, too.”

Hourly calorie consumption of genealogical activities:

beating around the bush 75
jumping to conclusions 100
climbing the walls 150
passing the buck 25
dragging your heels 100
bending over backward 75
running around in circles 350

Quoted in The Family Tree, Odom Library, from the Genealogy Unlimited Society, Inc. in Valdosta, GA.

The more we use our brain, the higher energy consumption we use up, but we (I) sometimes stumble upon a message from a new user who hasn't added anything, only just've joined Geni, asking (likely a bit upset) in mail; - Where is my family tree?
Well, where's your energy loss?

For those Disney fans, you will especially appreciate this one... I just know everyone wonders how those Ducks are related...

Carl Barks's "Duck Family Tree"

How the Ducks are related is an old much-debated topic in duckdom, and it has been discussed at some length in the Disney comics list as well. This file does not contain The Answers to those questions, but just information on one interesting source of such information, namely a duck family tree that Carl Barks made in the early fifties for his own reference. I won't try to redraw it here, but the information in it is:

* Old “Scotty” McDuck had the following children:
** Matilda McDuck who married Goosetave Gander,
** Scrooge McDuck,
** Hortense McDuck.

* Grandma Duck had the following children:
** Quackmore Duck,
** Daphne, who married Luke the Goose.

* Hortense McDuck and Quackmore Duck married and had Thelma Duck (the mother of Huey, Dewey and Louie) and Donald Duck.
* Luke the Goose and Daphne had one son, Gladstone, who was orphaned when Daphne and Luke overate at a free-lunch picnic. Gladstone was then adopted by Matilda McDuck and Goosetave Gander!
* Gus Goose was a nephew of Luke the Goose “making him a very distant ‘cousin’ of Donald”.

This tree was only a rough sketch, and is published in Carl Barks Library, Set VI, p. 476. On the same page is also Mark Worden's cleaned-up version originally published in CAPA-alpha [issue number?]. A peculiar change is that in Mark Worden's version Goosetave Gander is renamed! In Worden's original version in CAPA-alpha it was Goosetale instead, but in the reproduction in CBL it's Goosetail! [What's the story behind those changes?] [Are there any other differences between the printings of Worden's tree?] Later this tree was the main source for “Don Rosa's Duck Family Tree”. (http://stp.lingfil.uu.se/~starback/dcml/chars/cb-tree.html)

Hilarious Observations about Genealogists

* 1. Genealogists don’t get Alzheimer’s, they just lose their census.
* 2. Eventually, all genealogists come to their census.
* 3. Housework avoidance strategy: Genealogy!
* 4. There’s a fine line between a packrat and a serious family historian.
* 5. A home with everything in its place, and a place for everything, means you’re not well suited for genealogy!
* 6. Can’t find enough ancestors? No problem. Let me adopt you. I’ve got more than enough to share.
* 7. Does your family coat of arms have too many or too few sleeves?
* 8. Taking your children to meet family at a reunion is often an effective form of birth control.
* 9. Genealogical paydirt is discovering the ancestor who was the family packrat!
* 10. Heredity might be better spelled as heir-edity.
* 11. I can’t find my ancestors, so they must have been in a witness protection program!
* 12. Motivated genealogists scan once—and then share across the Internet!
* 13. A genealogist’s bad heir day is when you can’t find what you are looking for.
* 14. A genealogist’s filing system usually incorporates the floor.

So right,especially point 14.

This one is kind of long, but well worth taking the time to read, esp. if you are "old"...

Five Advantages to Old Age

The older I get the more I realize things are definitely improving on several fronts. Life becomes easier, boundaries expand, standards slacken as freedom abounds. Why do we fear the aging process when it has so much to offer? Old age is what we’ve yearned for since we were eight years old. We simply fail to realize it. Without too much effort I can think of five reasons to look forward to old age. (I will not set an exact age at which one might be considered ‘old’. If you’re old I assume you know it.)

Fashion no longer matters.
* As if it ever did in the first place, especially if you happen to be male. Plaid shirt, striped pants (preferably shorts), white socks with open-toed sandals are the norm and no one bats an eye. Wear the same trousers and shirt for six consecutive days. You’ve earned the right. The standards as set forth by society no longer apply, after all, you’re old. You’ve got better things to worry about besides what you’re going to wear because, well, you’re old. You haven’t got that much time left. Ten minutes to find a clean shirt is ten minutes squandered in my book. Another plus for the aged; nothing needs to fit. My neighbor wears a T-shirt that would fit a fourteen year old and pants at least four sizes too big, hiked up to within four inches of his armpits. Looks like someone put a pair to pants on an egg but what does he care? At a certain age you no longer need to impress those around you. You’re no longer seeking a mate, employment or votes. Those days are long gone unless you happen to be a Supreme Court Justice and even then, you get to wear a robe most of the time. I guarantee you; under those robes at least one of them is wearing an REO Speedwagon concert T-shirt from 1979 and Sans-a-belt slacks that would fit a Volkswagen. Another thing, why is it an old guy like me can go through the last glorious days of his life dressing like a fashion train wreck and when I finally pass, they’ll dress me in a suit and lay me in an $8,000 coffin? No one will recognize me!

Forgiveness is more abundant.
* Let’s face it. When you’re ‘old’ you can pretty much do as you please and get away with it. You’re old! What are they going to do to you? Nothing, that’s what. Just about anything you might do can be excused on account of age. Trust me, it’s a great feeling to have. You can go to the next family reunion and tell Aunt Agnes she is a shriveled up old hag that no one’s ever liked and you’d be happy to dance at her funeral. Your children will immediately come to your defense every time. “You’ll have to forgive Poppa Aunt Agnes. He’s old you know.” Shoplift all you want. If you ever do get caught you have a readymade defense. “Hey, I’m just an old guy that don’t know what he’s doing. Where am I? This ain’t the home.” What are they going to do, arrest you? Go ahead and eat that last piece of pie your daughter’s been saving for your son-in-law. What’s he going to do to you? You’re old! True story, one Sunday not too long ago we had a guest preacher. He was just about the long-windedest bore I’ve ever listened to. After about a half-hour of his droning my wife’s Uncle Joe called out, “Get to the point! I’m eighty-seven years old. I ain’t got time for this”. We all just smiled ‘cause after all, Uncle Joe’s old.

Lowered physical standards
* At some advanced point in your life you’re going to be shaped like a pear, a stick or a beach ball. It’s a scientific fact so you might as well accept it. It’s proven that if you live long enough every part of your body is either going to sag, disappear or expand. There are no other options so relish the changes. Nothing on your body is where it used to be or is supposed to be and at some point, no amount of surgery is going to make it right again. Throughout life noses and ears continue to grow. Don’t believe me? Look around. At our last family get-together my Grandpa Mike was there. He was eating corn-on-the-cob and actually bit the end of his nose. From behind he looks like a Volvo with the doors open. We live in Tennessee and I swear he can smell a cook-out in Kentucky with that thing. His ears are following at a close second. He’s always complaining his shirt collars are too small and he dang near chokes if he has to wear a tie. Come to find out when he buttons the top button to put a tie on he catches his own ear lobes in the collar of the shirt making it tighter. Now there’s a problem you don’t need. Thing is, after you reach that magic age, nobody cares what you look like anymore. It’s great. You can look like a cross between a wart hog and Abe Vagoda and be adored. How else would you explain Ernest Borgnine, Cloris Leachman or Betty White? Love ‘em all but you got to admit they look like the thumb of a used catcher’s mitt.

Our creator knew what he was doing when he made us. When we become officially ‘old’ certain things no longer matter as they did before. We give up those dreams of being a rock star, race car driver, astronaut or shortstop for the Yankees. At some point in every life a switch is flipped and the only things that matter are the things that matter. Old age is the warm blanket we wrap ourselves in as we watch Wheel of Fortune.

(I just noticed I only gave you three reasons. What’d you expect? I’m old)

Old Tombstone Epitaphs 2--
These epitaphs are allegedly taken from actual tombstones. Hope you enjoy these. Some are quite clever!!! I know you are dying to read them:

On the grave of Ezekiel Aikle in East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
Here lies Ezekial Aikle Age 102: The Good Die Young.
=========================================
In a London, England cemetery:
Ann Mann: Here lies Ann Mann,
Who lived an old maid
But died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767
=========================================
In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery:
Anna Wallace: The children of Israel wanted bread.
And the Lord sent them manna.
Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.
=========================================
Playing with names in a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:
Here lies Johnny Yeast,
Pardon me
For not rising.
=========================================
Memory of an accident in a Uniontown, Pennsylvania, cemetery:
Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake:
Stepped on the gas
Instead of the brake.
=========================================
In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:
Here lays Butch.
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger,
But slow on the draw.
=========================================
A widow wrote this epitaph in a Vermont cemetery:
Sacred to the memory of my husband
John Barnes who died January 3, 1803.
His comely young widow, aged 23,
has many qualifications of a good wife,
and yearns to be comforted.
=========================================
A lawyer's epitaph in England:
Sir John Strange:
Here lies an honest lawyer,
And that is Strange.
=========================================
Someone determined to be anonymous in Stowe, Vermont:
I was somebody.
Who, is no business
Of yours.
=========================================
Lester Moore was a Wells, Fargo Co. station agent for Naco, Arizona in the cowboy days of the 1880's.
He's buried in the Boot Hill Cemetery in Tombstone, Arizona:
Here lies Lester Moore.
Four slugs from a .44.
No Les No More.
=========================================
In a Georgia cemetery:
"I told you I was sick!"
=========================================
John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery:
Reader, if cash thou art in want of any.
Dig 4 feet deep, and thou wilt find a Penny.
=========================================
On Margaret Daniels grave at Hollywood Cemetery, Richmond, Virginia:
She always said her feet were killing her
but nobody believed her.
=========================================
In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England:
On the 22nd of June - Jonathan Fiddle –
Went out of tune.
=========================================
Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls, Vermont, has an epitaph that sounds like something from a Three Stooges movie:
Here lies the body of our Anna Done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low.
But the skin of the thing that made her go.
=========================================
More fun with names with Owen Moore in Battersea, London, England:
Gone away Owin' more than he could pay.
=========================================
Someone in Winslow, Maine, didn't like Mr. Wood:
In Memory of Beza Wood Departed this life Nov. 2, 1837 Aged 45 yrs.
Here lies one Wood enclosed in wood,
One Wood Within another.
The outer wood Is very good:
We cannot praise The other.
=========================================
On a grave from the 1880's in Nantucket, Massachusetts:
Under the sod and under the trees
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there's only the pod:
Pease shelled out and went to God.
=========================================
The grave of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania, is almost a consumer tip:
Who was fatally burned March 21, 1870
By the explosion of a lamp filled with
"R.E. Danforth's Non-Explosive Burning Fluid"
=========================================
Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York:
Born 1903--Died 1942
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down.
It was.
=========================================
But does he make house calls?
Dr. Fred Roberts, Brookland, Arkansas:
Office upstairs
=========================================

Have you come across any "interesting", unique headstone epitaphs??? Please feel free to add them here and include a general location of the headstone/cemetery, like above.

I put a bunch more of interesting epitaphs way back in June of 2014, if you want to go back then to read more... They were listed over numerous days. Dust off your funny bone for a lot of chuckles.

I went back to the entries in 2014 to find those epitaphs already posted... Found them starting on pg. 4 (5/29/14) and continued onto pg. 5 (thru 6/11/14). It was kind of neat to go back to re-read some of those old posts. Chuckled again!!!

I hope you all will occasionally go back in time to re-read some of the posts and comments.

Thanks to all of you who have added humor & comments to this discussion.

There is also a picture board discussion for cartoons/images that kind of go along with this discussion. See: https://www.geni.com/projects/Picture-Board-for-Genealogy-Humor-Dis... Picture Bd for Geni Humor Discussion. The site is a good place to put those genealogy related cartoons or other related pix for the Genealogy humor discussion. Click on “Photos & Documents” to get to “Photos & Documents for Picture Board for Genealogy Humor Discussion”

22 US laws still in effect today

* [http://justsomething.co/the-22-most-ridiculous-us-laws-still-in-eff... Justsomething -The 22 most ridiculous US Laws still in effect today. #10 is just crazy... LOL!]

I found these and had to laugh at some of them & sometimes wonder what the original reason for making them!!! Does your state or country have some that have you scratching your head and wondering "Why?".

22) Bingo games cannot last more than 5 hours (North Carolina)
21) Chickens are not allowed to cross the road (Quitman, Georgia)
20) If you cut down a cactus, you could be sentenced to 25 years in prison (Arizona)
19) Policemen are allowed to bite a dog if they think it will calm the dog down (Paulding, Ohio)
18) It’s illegal to sell your eyeballs (Texas)
17) It’s against the law to sing off-key (North Carolina)
16) You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a Sunday (Rhode Island)
15) You are not allowed to eat fried chicken any other way than using your hands (Gainesville, Georgia) A Gainesville, Ga, ordinance makes it illegal to consume fried chicken any way other than by hand. Enacted in 1961 as a PR stunt to promote Gainesville as a beacon of poultrydom, the law still remains on the books. ([https://people.howstuffworks.com/10-archaic-laws1.htm Howstuffworks - 10 Completely Archaic Laws Still on the Books. By: Chris Offer])
14) Marriage between cousins is against the law only if they are younger than 65 (Utah)
13) Red cars may not drive down Lake Street (Minneapolis, Minnesota)
12) It’s forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public (Carrizozo, New Mexico)
11) Bear wrestling matches are prohibited (Alabama)
10) You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit (Wyoming)
9) You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday (Washington)
8) It’s illegal to attend a public event or use public transport within 4 hours of eating an onion or garlic (Indiana)
7) In San Antonio, flirting is against the law (Texas)
6) It’s illegal for a man to give his fiancé a box of candy tha weighs mor than 50 lbs (22.5 kg) (Idaho)
5) A motorist with criminal intentions must stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town (Washington)
4) If you are found stealing soap, you must wash yourself until the bar of soap has been completely used up (Arizona)
3) If you have mustaches, it’s illegal for you to kiss a woman (Eureka, Nevada)
2)It’s against the law for a woman to drive a car in Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag to warn other people on the road (Waynesboro, Virginia; another site says this is in Memphis, Tennessee)
1) You can be arrested or fined for harassing Bigfoot (Washington)

Number 20 isn't that ridiculous. Saguaro cactus can live 150+ years. But I love #5 and #2!

A Cardiologist's Funeral

A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital where he had worked for most of his life. A huge heart... covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.
 
At that point, one of the mourners just burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, 'I am so sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral... I'm a gynecologist.'
 
The priest fainted.

Nice

Hillarious really!!

Funny Genealogy Quotes & Definitions

* 1) Family history is all about recording “his story & her story.”
* 2) Definition of mythology: genealogy without documentation.
* 3) Famous quote that applies (all too often) to questionable genealogy: “Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.” —Mark Twain
* 4) “Just the facts, Ma’am.” —(commonly, but incorrectly) attributed to Joe Friday of the TV show Dragnet.
* 5) “Genealogy: An account of one’s descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his own.” —Ambrose Bierce
* 6) Genealogists are time travelers.
* 7) A great genealogist is a time unraveler.
* 8) Genealogy: In the end, it’s all relative.
* 9) A genealogist is someone who knows that all grandparents are great grandparents!
* 10) Genealogy is sometimes about proving that bad family traits came from the other side of the tree!
* 11) If you shake your family tree, watch for the nuts to fall.
* 12) Genealogy is all about chasing your own tale.

The Snotty Receptionist ...

Yesterday I had an appointment to see the urologist for a prostate exam. Of course I was a bit on edge because all my friends have either gone under the knife or had those pellets implanted.

The waiting room was filled with patients. As I approached the receptionist’s desk, I noticed that she was a large unfriendly woman who looked more like a Sumo wrestler than woman.

I gave her my name, and in a very loud voice, she said, “YES, I HAVE YOUR NAME HERE.  YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT?"

All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at me, a now very embarrassed man! But as usual, I recovered quickly, and in an equally loud voice replied, “NO, I’VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION, BUT I DON’T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS.”

Halloween Meanings

* 1) Bobbing Apples: What happens when you jog without a bra.
* 2) Boogieman: Guy who passes time at a stoplight picking his nose.
* 3) Coffin: What you do when you get a piece of popcorn stuck in your throat.
* 4) Frankenstein: Hot dog and a mug of beer.
* 5) Full moon: What your repairman reveals when he bends over to fix your fridge.
* 6) Goblin: How you eat the Snickers bars you got for Halloween.
* 7) Invisible Man: What a guy becomes when there's housework to be done. Also, see "Mr. Hyde."
* 8) Jack O' Lantern: An Irish Pumpkin.
* 9) Jack the Ripper: What Jack does to his lottery tickets after losing each week.
* 10) Mummy: Who kisses the boo-boo after you scrape your knee.
* 11) Pumpkin Patch: What a pumpkin wears when trying to quit smoking.
* 12) Skeleton: Any supermodel.
* 13) Vampire Bat: What Dracula hits a baseball with.
* 14) Witch: See "Mother-in-Law."
* 15) Zombie: What you look like before that first cup of morning coffee.

Halloween Riddles

What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes?
*** A cereal killer...

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road?
*** It had no guts...

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
*** No, they eat the fingers separately...

What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
*** "Do you believe in people?"

What's a vampire's favorite fast food?
*** A guy with very high blood pressure...

Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal?
*** He heard it had great circulation...

What is: Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, THUMP!
*** Yep, that was you laughing your head off!

Here are some more Halloween jokes... Hope you chuckle or at least groan at these.

Chased by a Coffin

A man is walking home alone late on Halloween night. It's dark, and the streetlights are out. Suddenly, he hears BUMP! BUMP! BUMP! behind him. He walks faster, but the sound keeps up with him. BUMP! BUMP! BUMP!

Worried he is being followed, he glances behind him and through the darkness, and he can just see an upright coffin. No one seems to be holding the coffin; it's just bumping down the street.

He hurries to his house. With fumbling fingers, he finally opens his front door. The coffin is right on his front porch!

He feels around for something heavy to throw at the coffin. He finally finds a bottle of cough syrup and hurls it, saying: “That should stop that coffin!”

***********************************

Cemetery Short Cut

One dark night two men were walking home after a party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"

***********************************

Why Pumpkins are Better Than Men

1. Every year you get a brand new crop to choose from.
2. No matter what your mood is, pumpkins are always ready to greet you with a smile.
3. One usually makes a better pie.
4. They are always on the doorstep there waiting for you!
5. If you don't like the way he looks, you just carve up another face.
6. If he starts smelling up your place, you can just throw him out.
7. From the start you know a pumpkin has an empty, mush filled head to begin with.
8. A pumpkin is turned on (lit-up) only when you want him to be.

Several months ago, I received a large box of photos from my recently deceased cousin. This led to some fabulous discoveries. Here is what I wrote at the time. "As I go through all my grandmother’s photos and letters I am coming to know her much better. As a child I saw her, maybe once a year and she died when I was still very young. I did not really know her. Now I am fascinated with her. She was funny, strong, courageous and smart. She overcame many struggles in her life, and showed a sense of humor while doing so. Oh how I wish I could talk to her now. Why didn’t I talk to her more when she was alive? I think I know. As young people were are engrossed in our own lives. We don’t really see our elders as people with stories worth telling. This is becoming clear to me as I post Grandma’s photos and stories. I get comments from the “older” people. But my young family members (her great grandchildren and great great nieces and nephews) seem to just scroll by. I realize that I am now the little old lady that my grandmother was to me in the early sixties."

Mary, I agree with you whole heartedly... we don't appreciate our elders until they are gone from this life and can no longer be a resource. I wish I had been interested in my family history much earlier in my life as now I am that older person & those who could have answered my questions are no longer around!!! We do need to be speaking to those who are our seniors as they are becoming fewer & fewer!!! I also have a bunch of photos but I don't recognize the people in them & those who might know who is in them are no longer around to help with identification. So sad. :=(

Happy IVGLDSW Day! 

Today is International Very Good Looking, Darn Smart Woman's Day, so please send this message to someone you think fits this description. Please do not send it back to me as I have already received it from a Very Good Looking, Darn Smart Woman! And remember this motto to live by:  “Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, totally worn out and screaming 'WHOO HOOOOO what a ride!”   

* Inside every older person is a younger person -- wondering what the hell happened.
- Cora Harvey Armstrong

* Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out; but I can usually shut her up with cookies. - (Unknown)

* The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy. - Helen Hayes (at 73)

* I refuse to think of them as chin hair.  I think of them as stray eyebrows. - Janette Barber

* Old age ain't no place for sissies. - Bette Davis

* Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart. - Caryn Leschen

* If you can't be a good example -- then you'll just have to be a horrible warning. - Catherine

* I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. - Roseanne Barr

* Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. - Maryon Pearson

* Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission. - Eleanor Roosevelt

* When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over!!